What life are we living?

  I ask myself this all the time. For some people it’s an easy and quick answer. As for me, I have my goals, dreams, and ideas for the life ahead of me. As for how or when, is what I’m seeking? I know God has total control of all things, but I wonder why I feel empty. Why is it that no matter what I do, it seems like it’s nothing and it eventually fades? What is it I am supposed to do, complete, or accomplish in this life? I feel like all I’ve done is nothing, and that I could have done so much more, or something else.

I can honestly say I dislike when people think highly of me. I am a human, a sinner, just like everyone else in this planet. Why should I out of millions be chosen by God? I don’t question God, because I know he has a plan and within his plan there is a purpose. Though I may not understand, I am trying my best to just stop wondering, and just trust in him and obey him fully. Some may see me as a good Christian, or leader, I don’t see things like others do. Though I am not the best person, nor the worst, I can be better. Not for me, nor my family, but for God. I feel as if I fail him daily, though all humans do fail God daily with sin, but I feel like I fail him more than others. I am being completely honest with myself; I won’t deny my sins, or my mistakes. I may not admit them to the faces of humans; because it’ll be like looking at a mirror. They are probably failing in the same areas. I still believe that confession within believers is a good and needed step in moving forward in life.

I am learning and realizing that there are so many Christians who live this fake life. They go on living as if they are Jesus, as if they were sinless. I consider them ridiculous, and annoying. There is nothing worst then a person who denies their sins, and mistakes, and points out the ones of others. Why can’t we all just be honest with ourselves and to God? We are sinners, we fail and sometimes we don’t admit the fact we aren’t perfect, but for some reason we find joy, pointing the flaws, and mistakes of others.

I can no longer follow the pattern of the Christians of the world. I see two kinds of Christians on earth. The ones who are living here, who are not of this world, and the others who are actually of this world, trying to reach the heavenly places but attached to their worldly desires. You must choose only one thing to carry with you in the path of life, the world or the cross. I personally know the word of God says we must carry our cross. Sadly many of us have dropped the cross, perhaps lost it a long time ago, and picked up everything we found along the path known as sins such as, fleshly desires, or perhaps emotions of hatred, jealousy, and pride. Every true Christian has dealt with one of these examples, or something similar to it.

I can honestly admit to the fact that I have, and I have no shame in admitting it. Why should we hide when the truth all comes to the light? The first step of actually letting go of bad habits, such as repeated sins, is to confess, and be set free from those strongholds once and for all. I am sick and tired of being held down, being driven by the spirit, and then the enemy misleading me. The enemy has tried numerous of times to get me out of the Christian walk. Even tried to kill me several times, but for some reason I’m still here, I know God has some kind of purpose with me, but at this moment as I write this, I feel so unworthy, so deep in this sadness, that just feels like its eating me alive.

I honestly feel like giving it all up. I feel like I am not worthy of being placed in the positions I am in. As others wait for their turn, I feel like I cut the line and got here, though I know I haven’t. I feel my spirit fighting against my mind and heart. I feel my body reaching for the world, as my spirit screams out to God. There is so many things going on at the same time, and I’m at the point I just don’t know what I want anymore, the passion for God is there, the passion to worship is there, but it’s not burning like before, it’s as if the fire has been put out, but there are ashes still lit up, ready to burst into flames. I feel like I’m living two lives in one body, it’s weird, but sadly Christians don’t notice it is possible, to go to church, serve, and still end up in hell. Why you may ask? Simple answer, you must give your all to God, or nothing, it’s not a hard concept to understand, but it is not easy to accomplish.

No man but Jesus has walked on the earth, and has never failed God. Jesus is the true and only example of a true follower of God. As for the rest of us, there’s a mix of Jesus freaks, the religious, and the realist. I place myself in the category of realist. I accept the fact I am not perfect, I sin daily, and I am not the perfect Christian, but I am completely honest, and open about it. The Jesus freaks, live life acting like just knowing about Jesus, wearing a shirt with Jesus name on it, or having crosses around their necks is going to save them. Please you’re wasting your time, and you are never going to meet the real Jesus unless you actually build a real relationship with him first, a spiritual relationship, not a religious life style. Last but never the least are the religious people. They are known as the ones who literally push others into the flames of hell. All by the power of the human mouth, they judge, and cast people away because they don’t meet up to your own personal standards. Thinking if people aren’t good enough for them, then God must not like them either, the hell with you they say, in secret terminologies behind the veil, but they can never hide their obvious expressions. Religious people are the ones I like to call the front line, want to know why? Because they will be the last to enter the spiritual court to be judged, but they’ll be the first to hear his voice say, “I NEVER KNEW YOU!”

I confess once again, I am not a perfect person, I sin, and I’m human, made of flesh and bones. But living life trying to build a relationship with God, and trying my best to move forward. Have I failed at certain moments sure, I’m going to give you a big fat yes on that. Have others judged me, or continue to do so, yes. Will I allow that to affect me, no, wonder why? Well it’s simple, humans aren’t God. I am not saying I don’t care about what others think of me, because a Christian should care. If people cannot see Christ within you, then you don’t have Christ. It’s a given fact that a life without God is a human body just getting old and eventually dies; a life lived for God, is a human who accepts they are a sinner but knows that God has a purpose for their life. They accept the molding process, and allow God to do his will in them.

I want to live that life, allowing God to have full control, no longer will I make decisions, but I will continue trusting, believing, and knowing that God is God, holy and matchless, and I am a sinner trying to live a humble life before God, and humanity.

-Mimic

Tears of a Follower

   Why? I ask myself and God this every day. Why is it when things were going so great, so amazing, and life seemed so perfect, when all of a sudden everything faded. My entire life I spent it avoiding friendship, because all the previous ones in the past had faded, and sometimes I live expecting the same as well. Though I see myself moving forward, and making friends, for some reason I can never forget, or leave behind some. No need for names, God and I know who they are. I feel like I’m spiritually fighting for their salvation.

Salvation is an individual thing, but sometimes it feels like we must fight for those who aren’t able to fight for themselves at a certain time. Perhaps they don’t even notice they have fallen, and are completely tangled within the traps and tricks of the enemy. It’s sad to have been so close to someone spiritually and now you are so far away, it totally sucks! It seems like they go on living life, as if you weren’t nothing to them, or perhaps they remember but the enemy has placed a blindfold in front of them which does not allow them to actually see clearly.

I don’t know about how the rest of the world lives their life, but I live life moving forward. Moving forward doesn’t always mean to forget about the past, it means to accept what life brought at you, and doing something with it. I still love all those who I shared some kind of friendship with, doesn’t matter the amount of time we knew each other, I treasure everyone.

I pray for them daily Lord, you are my witness. I honestly have started feeling tired of actually praying. At times I feel like there is no hope. But I rebuke that thought, because it doesn’t come from you Lord. Regardless of what my mind or the enemy says, I will not give up on those I love. I will continue praying till I run out of words to say, even if my I lose my voice, my spirit cries for their salvation lord. I feel my spirit shouting to the highest of hills, screaming for their salvation.

Now I am beginning to understand a bit more what you did on the cross for us Lord. While we hurt you, and mocked you, you still screamed to the heavens saying “forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing!” Jesus you never gave up on me, you died for me, and that is why I cannot and will not give up on those I love. I will go to the end to do your will, which is to spread the gospel. I shall not give up Lord, for you are my strength.

God I ask you to give me the strength to continue moving forward. Give me the strength to continue praying for those who are in the cemetery of the world. Give me the strength to pray for those who have lost their sight in Christ, and for those who have hurt me. God give me the strength to have mercy, grace, compassion, and forgiveness. I want to love like Christ loved. I want to be the brother, and friend you created me to be Lord. Guide me daily, and allow me to be an example to them Lord.

Help me Lord not to move forward, without their faces engraved in my heart, and mind. Give me the strength to fight for their salvation, and to bring them to the light of truth. So they may see for themselves and accept the fact that without you in their life they have nothing. They may gain the whole world, but without you they have nothing but the burning flames of hell to look forward to. But in you they have salvation, everlasting life, and love that never ends, or changes. God help me reflect you always. Decrease me Lord, so you may increase. Fill me with your wise, encouraging words that can lift up the dead. Fill me with your presence so where ever I go, your Holy Spirit is felt and manifested. Fill me with your love, so they may know and understand what true love is. Fill me with your forgiveness so I may be set free from any anger, sadness, or hatred. Fill me with grace, so I may love unconditionally, regardless of the harm others may do towards me. Help me move forward in love. I ask this in the name of Jesus, Amen.

-Mimic

Calling out to God

  God! This world seems like too much at times. It’s hard to deal with so many situations, problems and to top it off the stupid opinions and comments of emotional people trying to be all spiritual. I want to walk into your presence, not a so called spiritual circus. I’m not interested in entertainment; I’m looking for an encounter with you. Help me see the truth, even though I may be surrounded with lies. Please shine your light, let the truth be exposed for all to see, so that cleansing, healing, and repentance can begin.

You are always there when I’m mad, sad, annoyed, depressed, stress, and you always make me feel better. You make me feel like what I’m going through is nothing big because you are my solution, you carry my burdens and you lift me up when I fall. You do all of this with your tender, but yet straight forward and merciful love. Your love is like no other, it’s irreplaceable, but best of all its everlasting.

I need you now more than ever, it seems like things get harder every day. More stress, drama, and religious people honestly get even more ridiculous as time passes by. Ha Ha, I laugh because I am learning not to get mad. I been learning to keep my mouth shut, so that I may not speak, but the Holy Spirit through me. I am being molded to your image, so when I look in the mirror I don’t see me, I see you. My help comes from you. In you I find sense of humor, in you I find myself laughing with joy even while I’m surrounded with situations that attack my mind but in you I am free of all anguish, in you I am free of all worries. In you I find my solution, my rescue, my deliverance, and my freedom. God you are my everything.

God as I call out to you, I give myself away, so you may mold me, correct me, transform me, save me from myself, and make me more like you. Help me love like you, help me speak like you, help me live like you. Help me God! I need you, because everything else has faded away, everyone is gone, and I realized all I ever needed was you.

As I’m calling, you’re listening. As I’m asking, you’re answering. As I’m wondering, you’re finding.  As I’m worrying, you’re solving.  As I believe, you’re molding me.

I will no longer allow my flesh to have control; I will no longer allow my emotions to get the best of me. I will surround all to you God, so you may do your will in me. I bow down before you, in humility, humbleness, repentance, and in acceptance that without you I am nothing. But in you I am VICTORIOUS!

God! I know your listening, and I just want you to know that my trust is in you. Help me, and help all those who surround me. Lift us up, give us new strength, and lead us to where you have called us to be. Let us not take any decision, or make any steps without your clear direction first. Amen

-Mimic

Worship Lifestyle

Worship alone is something all believers are in deep need of daily. Worship is the key point along with prayer in our relationship with God. Someone once told me, “faith moves mountains, and worship moves the hand of God”. Since that day, those words have followed me. I remember them daily, and every time I get the chance to speak to someone about worship, I tell them the same.

Within the churches of today, there are believers, or church goers, who still don’t have any clue or idea of the importance behind worship. They don’t understand the purpose, or outcome of what happens when we worship in spirit and in truth. The hand of God moves! That alone says it all. Meaning when we worship God begins to transform, deliver, heal, and save his people. He begins to cleanse all that is unpleasing before his eyes, and replaces it with his presence, power, anointing, joy, and happiness.

Worship is not something we should just do in church. It’s not about raising our hands, singing, and dancing, there is much more then that; it’s about having an intimate moment with God, about giving your all to him, so he can give you what I like to call a sample of his presence. Worship is a daily need, just as we drink and eat, so that our body survives. Our spirit is in much more need, and worship along with prayer is how we feed our spirit. Giving it what it needs to survive, giving it that extra push we need to keep moving forward. Only God can fill us with the tools we need to fight the spiritual fight. Without our participation in worship or prayer, we will not be able to fight, and we’ll surely fall.

There are people who God uses within worship to minister in a prophetic form. They are used by God to deliver a message, that impacts God’s people because their spiritual needs are being taken care of, their prayers are being answered. Others are being delivered of strongholds that the enemy has placed, and through worship and prayer, chains are also broken! All are called to worship, but not all are used to minister the same way. Some preach, teach, evangelize, and others minister through fine arts. All of these are callings from God; all must live a lifestyle of worship in order to continue being led by the Holy Spirit.

Worship is not a Sunday thing; it’s a daily spiritual need. It is our way to connect to God. It is the only way we can see God’s presence move before our eyes, and hear his truth being spoken clearly.

Matthew 5:23-24,

“Therefore if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering.”

Our worship is an offering to God! That is amazing, but if there is something within us that needs to be taken care of, stop at once, in that moment, and do what you got to do. Without love our worship is just noise, words, and dance steps or moves to God. Love is what makes our worship pure, makes it come not from the heart, but from deep within our spirit.

“Silent worship is what I do”

-Mimic

What is a Leader?

   Many people have different definitions for the word leader. There are many ways to explain what a leader is, does, and how to become one. I personally have the pleasure to be a leader. I am actually at the moment a leader of a fine arts ministry. I teach biblical studies, and pantomime. Within the two years in ministry, I’ve experienced numerous of things, which made me who I am today.

As a leader you come to a point where you realize it’s not about you, it’s about doing the Lord’s work, regardless of the amount of hard work it will take to complete the spiritual task. Each task completed gets you that much closer to the goal God has set for you and your ministry. The Lord has called me to start a family ministry, where the Lord can do his will through fine arts. God has commanded me to speak his message through arts, and give his people a visual of his presence, power, and anointing. In other words, we’re led by the Holy Spirit to bring a bit of heaven to Earth.

Through these two years in ministry, I’ve seen not only students spiritually grow but also myself. There is much more to grow, but together as one we will complete the spiritual goal ahead of us, and become the men and women God has called us to be. I recently gave my students a one on one. Where I met with each one and told them my personal views on how I saw them spiritually. I was completely honest about things I liked, disliked, and the things which needed to change. If you meet me in person, or ever have me as your leader, you will realize I’m a straight forward person, and I tell it how it is.

The word of God is clear, and that is how leaders must be towards those who surround them. I gave my students the opportunity to write down their personal views of me, as their leader. I learned that I myself have things I must improve on. This was a real eye opener for me, and it allowed me to realize all that I have to look forward to. Instead of getting upset, I became joyful, because I know God is continuously molding me, into the man, leader, brother, and Christian, I was created to be.

What is a leader? A leader is someone who accepts the fact they are not perfect, and when the truth is told to their face, they receive it, and place it into action. In other words they do something about it!

“There’s no better place to be, then in the hands of the potter”

-Mimic

Purpose of me starting a blog...

Lately the Lord has been telling me this "Start Writing" So here I am again. I used to have a blog on myspace but as we all know thats in the past. But what God starts in someone, he completes it. When the Lord places something in your spirit, no excuses JUST DO IT! You will never see what God can do through you, unless you do what he commands. 

I am not here to catch the attention of people, I'm in no need of it. Simply my spirit loves to share the truth of Christ. That is why he gave me the name "Voice Of Truth" for my blog. Glory be to God.


-Mimic